Reality Ramblings is back! I feel like we are still celebrating Queen Hayley’s win from Brain v Brawn, but that party is now over, we welcome a new batch of players and the original Survivor Queen to Blood v Water. This week my Sliding 7 will be my top 7 pairings so far (based on strategy, hotness, humour, anything goes), and Annabel is back with a racy new Spice Rack!! Let’s get stuck in…
SLIDING SEVEN
MARK AND GASHY
As it stands, Gashy (Sam) and Mark have shown they are the power couple to beat! And let’s be honest, they both had potential to do well last time, but them shacking up turned their games to shit. Oof. Mark’s had a fantastic start, positioning himself as an important asset to the tribe in regards to winning challenges, but also laying low at camp. Mark allowed Andy to take on the “leadership role” with camp shelter while he formed basic relationships with his tribemates. He pulled off an excellent blindside on Andy with the help of Princess Nina and is now in a position of power, gaining trust in the likes of King Khanh (aka his boyfie). At Blood camp, Sam has also been strategising quietly and forming the right alliances, showing us how she’s learnt from last time putting paranoia aside and showing more awareness in what’s happening with tribe dynamics… No men to distract you this time, Gashy! 😉 She pulled off a fun live tribal and returned serve at Dave after he threw her under the bus. Can’t wait to see how Sandra reacts to the bung vote thrown on her. What’s their shipname? Smark? Mashy?
BEN & SHAY
We saw Shay run for a podium idol she didn’t even see, she found idol clues with ease, girl is physically strong and her emotions are running off the scales, but we still love!! Cry it out, Shay! It’s a bit sad seeing her pine for Ben THAT much (thanks edit), but I have a feeling Shay will be around for a while, so cue more pining shots! She’s got game smarts and with the Briana vote-out she had her hands tied. When you know the majority is voting out your bud of 2 days you just gotta cut her loose. Shay made the right decision. I hardly think an alliance with in-ya-face Briana would have enhanced her game anyway. To her other half, we barely saw Ben until episode 3 and I was pretty meh on him to be honest. But when we saw he actually wants to work with the Queen, I was like HELL YEAHHH BOIIII!! Bring it on Benny, I’m ready to see this alliance moving forward. Use her knowledge, then stab her in the back later… Of course that’s a hypothetical and I will cut anyone who goes against Sandra!
CHRISSY & CROC
No matter your thoughts on Chrissy, she WILL “Outlast and Outfit us all Outside” this season! Huh?! I can so relate with Chrissy in that I also hate dirt, sand and water and it makes me wonder why I want to play this game at all!! BUT if Chrissy can do it, so can I! She is the epitome of STRAYA and I’m excited for the international viewers not understanding a thing she says. Chrissy may not know the game and thinks where you vote out tribemates is a Tribunal, but she is excellent casting and TV gold. PLUS she found the podium idol; I bet she has no idea who Adam Klein is, but he must be weeping. Chrissy is playing Survivor like a new job, learning how to maneuvre the game each day. Chrissy also tops the confessional board, ahead of Sandra; unbelievable! Croc on the other-hand has been very quiet, but his dominance and importance to the tribe through physical challenges is evident. We need to see more of Croc and where he sits in tribe dynamics.
AMY & KHANH
Dubbed “King Khanh”, one of my favourite Masterchef’s is having a wild time so far and you can see him being portrayed as this season’s villain <3. Ready to cut throats, Khanh has been fun to watch and been involved with orchestrating the blindsides of Andy and Briana. He also talked Shay into siding with him and she better watch out, Khanh is coming for your Idol! 😉 He also has good rapport with tribe-mates, is the resident camp cook and has a Survivor boyfriend in Mark; LIVING THE DREAM!! I never thought this was a pairing I needed. Over to the Red tribe and we’ve barely seen Amy speak, but she’s the hottie we’ve been waiting for so c’mon editors, give us something!! #crushpickalert
JESSE & JORDIE
Jesse and Jordie are SUPER CUTE. We haven’t seen too much of the young dudes, though they are very likeable and I hope we see more once the bigger characters are out of the way. They are Aussie larrikins I can root for. Jesse (does he not look 12?!) being starstruck by Sandra was humbling and I would love to see him be her goat; ironic, right?! (No, no, Sandra was never a GOAT!!). Just the look of Jordie’s overalls gives me sympathetic chafing… Shame on you Survivor wardrobe allowing this!! Both are strong in challenges as well and I can’t seem them going anywhere for a while yet!
KJ & SOPHIE
OK, calling it, KJ is my winner pick! Survivor Superfan mum who wants to kick her entrepreneur sister’s ass in the game she loves?! Heck yes! KJ has only had one confessional so far, but they have shown her in the mix and looks to be in a potential power alliance with Nina and Mel, which I am living for! I feel it in my waters that we will see more of KJ soon. And if we don’t well I’m going to lose money as I have her in a Survivor sweep. Sophie has been absolutely smashing it challenges and really showed us her grit and how amazing her overarm throws are! How ’bout that slowmo shot in the first immunity challenge, phwoar! Now, I’ve followed Sophie on the socials for a while and she has a super cute PJ line and a really hot girlfriend, so if she goes home early she can’t be too sad! I’m worried about her explosive, opinionated self which she did bring up this week. We’ll see how long she can keep her trap shut, but for now, yeah the girls!!
NINA AND SANDRA
Sandra and Nina entered the competition just how Oprah would to her daily talk show; a helicopter and a bold statement! The confessionals from Sandra have been so extra, and I’m living for it. I don’t even care that they show her saying she’s “the queen”, that she “will cut anyone’s throat” or “beat down her daughter” multiple times during an episode! Just give me more Sandra content!! *fans self* And can we just applaud her for officially outlasting Russell Hantz on his SurvivorAU outing. The casuals might hate it, but I’m all for the hot mess American players crashing our shores. However, it’s been a week in and Sandra is looking to be on the chopping block soon, especially with Gashy throwing a vote her way last episode. I have every bit of faith that she will stick around a bit longer (thanks producers for putting her on such a strong tribe!! Not rigged at all) and I’d ultimately love to see her and Nina join up soon. Speaking of Nina, WOW has she pulled out some tricks from her mum’s Survivor handbook! Nina subtly getting Mark and co onside to execute the Andy blindside was masterful and she has positioned herself well within the Water tribe. Let’s see what else Nina has up her sleeve.
THE SPICE RACK
What a hot cast! Very into this. Full of feelings and I can’t wait to overshare them with you. Welcome to a new season of the Spice Rack – a fan fiction paradise where we conduct finely tuned scientific experiments to identify the supreme Crush Pick of the season, and match contestants with the Britney Spears song they best embody – hard hitting journalism. Before we kick things off, I would like us to all take a moment of silence for the Meldrums….. … … Okay and we are back. It took me a good fifteen minutes in the first episode to gratefully realise Andy’s hat did not say ‘Daddy,’ and for that alone, he deserved to make it through the first week. Shame on all of you.
The only thing that went on longer than the Mens Tennis Finals last week was the first three episodes of Blood vs Water, so let’s pull out what really mattered: who is crush worthy.
Initial Crush Pick: Amy
Has she even had a confessional? I don’t care. She is everything to me. I love her more than Kate loves KFC. How many people have become besties with Khanh just to get closer to his sister? Like.. millions.. probably.
Winner Pick: Shay
In 2019, I dated a lot of girls who were super into yoga, ‘spiritual’ tattoos and now probably post thinly veiled anti-vax content on their Instagrams. I didn’t date Shay, so maybe she just dabbles in crystals without fully committing to the lifestyle. Back then, Shay would have been my initial crush pick, but I feel like I have made real progress with my therapy recently. That said, if she reads Sophie’s book in Ponderosa and it really resonates with her, catch me on the first flight to wherever she is.|
Shay has winner written all over her. Intensely likeable, athletic, and clearly capable of tolerating anything given that she is married to one of the Lamingtons (see below), she was born for this.
Simping for: Sophie
Look I didn’t really know who Sophie was before this, but once I was filled in on her backstory by a friend, I knew she was my soulmate. Her whole Hetero-WAG to Bisexual-WAG personal growth arc was incredibly powerful. Most people never overcome the psychological damage of dating a man who plays football, but she turned it into a success story. Already texting my boss to see if we can get her as our next Motivational Speaker.
Introducing: The Lamingtons
The humble Lamington. A dry sponge, thinly coated in watery chocolate and drenched in desiccated coconut. Empty calories with a healthy dollop of nationalism. Have I consumed family-packs of Lamington fingers in my lifetime? Yes, multiple times. Did my sister and I almost accidentally kill our parents over them? Absolutely. Do I still question their popularity? It’s only natural.
We have been served up a family-sized packet of brunette, tanned men this season – almost indistinguishable from each other, their bland spongey responses to JLPs questions are deliciously coated in abs, nice hair, and their ability to inoffensively blend in with the rest of the meal.
Boomer Glossary
Simp/ing: verb – to obsess over someone in a way that is degrading to yourself but you don’t care
Therapy: where people go to discuss their issues so they don’t inflict them on the people closest to them. You should try it, please.
Blog by Lynda Olson. Guest writer Annabel Claire.
ALL IMAGES USED IN THIS ARTICLE ARE COPYRIGHT CHANNEL TEN & ENDEMOL SHINE. THIS IS A PERSONAL BLOG AND ALL GIFS AND VIEWS ARE MY OWN.
