Woah. Annabel and I skipped a week of blogging due to housing moves and isolating with kids (damn you, Covid!!) so Survivor AU had to be put on the back burner. But don’t worry, we are still watching and enjoying this cast (we want more hot mess please)! This week my Sliding 7 has gone back to individuals (sorta) and Annabel eats her feelings in a yummy Spice Rack.
SLIDING SEVEN
KHANH
Spicy. Hot. Cooks rice like a true Masterchef. Struts his stuff with the girls, and is pining for SAS Mark (we see it, boo). You can also see his strategic mind ticking away during the episodes. He’s the queer snake we’ve been asking for on Australian Survivor, and now he’s lost Amy to the Survivor Gods he is going to strike next week with a vengeance. I can feel it. I’m all for a Survivor villain, so keep bringing the goods, Khanh! Our Asian Sensation for the season, for sure! Behind Amy of course 😉
GASHY
Now, if anyone actually read my 2017 Survivor AU blogs, Gashy was my pre-season crush pick, much to Annabel’s disgust. But now, here we are and the Spice Rack queen has changed her tune (read her column below)! Haha. Gashy has continued to impress and is probably my favourite to win right now. Which means she probably won’t and I’ve just jinxed it all! She has laid the foundations in the Water tribe, and after a mini-breakdown over Mark not joining her at the tribe swap (love, you don’t need him), I can’t see her going anywhere anytime soon! Sure, winning tribal immunity helps, but she’s not perceived as too much of a threat, yet. Also, no more Sophie to rubbish her – although, I won’t lie, I’ll miss the high drama between them 😉
NINA
SHE VOTED OUT HER MOM. She will be paying for this the rest of her life. Nevertheless, Nina is playing one hell of a game so far and she’s masterfully, just like her mother, navigated her way to a comfortable position. She fell into the tribe swap on the Blood tribe with her mum, but stuck with majority and has now cemented her spot with the likes of Mark, Jordie and Shay. Nina said from the start she wanted to make sure she had some ‘strong’ players in her corner to take any perceived threat off herself. Gift of the gab that girl has, she is so articulate in the messages she gives other tribe mates. It’s working so far for her and I can see Nina making it very deep into the game. Jury for sure, but whether the Aussies want to sit next to and American Princess at the end is another thing…
MARK
I could easily have left out Mark (Sam is #1), but obviously can’t with the way he’s playing. Mark has one of the best returnee comebacks so far. Well-liked on both tribes I think he made the right decision in staying separate from Gashy at the tribe swap. Even though there were other pairings at Water you don’t want to show too much perceived threat and those two together would for sure give 2017 vibes again! Haha. Mark has come into this season ALL strategy. Even his faux bromance with the J-Crew (Jordie, Jordan, Josh) is admirable. I’d love to say Mark makes the finals, but being such a strong physical presence in the end game and also super likeable, I’m wary of how big a target he’ll be! Can the dude win every individual immunity to make F2?! Hmm.
CHRISSY
Arguably, the more interesting half of “the inlaws”, Chrissy has really stepped up to be a dark horse to make finals. Sure she came off a bit daft in terms of Survivor play, but is she putting on a bit?! I think so. Chrissy has pretty good intuition and quickly adapted to the game. And just to boost her game she’s now on a tribe with Croc who adds that extra strategic element. But I’m sorry, he’s just so boring. :/ Thank the heavens Chrissy is with us to give the show some extra spice and giggles!
BEN
Everyone is talking about Shay, but I’m here to talk about Ben. It’s probably because I have a tiny big crush on him, but whatevs. Ben was willing to align with Sandra, he’s lovely AF, he’s into making friends with high drama chicks like Sophie and an absolute beast at challenges (but not toxic macho), what’s not to love?! I was speaking before about Mark having to win every immunity, and I reckon Ben could do it. Maybe I am blinded, but I think he’s got a good shot at winning this.
MICHELLE/MEL
OK, my last pick was KJ (love ya) for the way she handled Sophie joining her tribe and ultimately voting her out, but I had to switch her out last minute (soz) for the Asian sensations who are Mel and Michelle. I’m lumping them together as this is how producers have treated them as well *eyeroll*. And also I have no idea who is who, even if they are split over the two tribes. They’ve had one confessional between them and it’s a f*cking rort! What bullshit are they playing at. Will one of them win? 3 weeks in, surely not. Will they be given 20 confessionals each on their boot episode? Better frickin’ happen! So yeah, this is to give the twinnies some love and say us superfans are noticing you!! <3
THE SPICE RACK
The Survivor Gods are conspiring to ruin my life. My internet is cut off for two weeks, so I painstakingly stream, crash and reload the episodes on my half-baked mobile hotspot only to see my crushes get smashed one by one. I am Debbie Wanner level pissed.
Anger is not a sexy emotion – very ageing. Occasionally sweaty as well, so like… the wrong kind of hot. So let’s do a detox and eat our feelings instead. This week we cast the cast as iconic Australian food-stuffs. Stuff you everyone who voted out my faves (unclear on this due to patchy streaming).
Pavlova – Sam
Refreshing, delightful, and definitely from New Zealand when being controversial. Firmly repressing all traumatic visions of Tony Abbott in a leather jacket, attempting to look seductively at the camera (now you have to try and repress too), I am able to find myself obsessed with Sam. Can’t wait for her and Shay to win the season, it will be amazing. She deserves all the limelight this season.
Tim Tams (the fictional double coat PLUS chewy caramel) – Amy
Isn’t Amy such a dream? Too good for this world, clearly. Look at her out there, popping on screen, having a lil charisma, keen to stir the pot. Love to see it. Likely to remain my season crush pick, but I would like to firmly underline that I am non-monogamous.
The Lamingtons – The Spongecake Men
Yes I am partially calmed by the pav/Tim Tam sugar hit but I am still cross with the Lamingtons. Who decided we needed that many beautiful bland men with identical names who think playing Survivor is about how much you can benchpress and screaming YEA THE BOYS? We don’t. I still get their names confused and they give me nothing. We need more queers (especially fun ones without a penchant for bullying their cast-mates xoxo). Josh (is it Josh? Shay’s husband who won that challenge) has graduated from the Lamingtons – he is a Tiramisu now, delicious but probably going to kill you.
Blog by Lynda Olson. Guest writer Annabel Claire.
ALL IMAGES USED IN THIS ARTICLE ARE COPYRIGHT CHANNEL TEN & ENDEMOL SHINE. THIS IS A PERSONAL BLOG AND ALL GIFS AND VIEWS ARE MY OWN.
