It’s the penultimate week of Australian Survivor! Has this season dragged on or what?! WHEW! Join me and Annabel’s Spice Rack as we love, laugh and cry over the weeks episodes. And as always the amazing cartoons are by Able and Game! http://www.ableandgame.com
EPISODE 22: Days 47-48
SUGAR MAMAS
Ziggy is sneaking WAYYY more lollies than she’s entitled to. She’s turning this Wonka Alliance into an alliance between her and the jar; forget Tara! Meanwhile, Tara is on the war path to get Locky out, again. Michelle talks about feeling ‘a little’ bad about voting Luke out… Sure. Locky is annoyed too that the only other strategic player, other than him, is gone. He keeps talking himself up and I can’t help but still love the ego-maniac!! What is wrong with me?! He tells Ziggy he still trusts Tara, but thinks she wants to go to the end with Michelle and Peter. Ziggy does well putting up a front about her relationship with Tara and the girls, high on sugar, finally realise they can’t go to the end with big man!
TAKING DOWN THE MUSCLES
Locky treats Jericho like a stupid person, it’s as if he thinks the little man has no idea what he’s doing there without Luke. Sigh. Jericho is like, EFF you, Locky!! But then says OKAY to Locky taking him out for a sweet snorkel. It’s OK, because Jericho is just buttering the big guy up for his eventual demise. I see what you’re doing Jeri 😉 Back at camp and Michelle tells the muscle man all the reasons why she doesn’t want to join him and Tara. Locky wants her to join his awesome crew, while Michelle wants him with her and Peter instead. But he’s like “NO, I’ll be on the bottom of YOUR lot”, and she’s like, “Well if I join you then I’m in the same boat!!”. This woman is loud and Locky storms off annoyed. On the side, Peter and Jericho agree either Locky or Ziggy to go next.
IMMUNITY STREAK
Locky wins his third immunity challenge and just when I was starting to like him again, he goes and says a douchey thing. “I had this for an hour, I had this forever”. OH PUH-LEASE! Men… Everyone is pissed, again. Jericho and Peter try and get Tara to join them to vote out Ziggy. Tara doesn’t want to get rid of her sweet chick, Zig! Locky is sure Peter will split and vote out Michelle. It looks likely it will head to rocks. Ziggy is happy to go to rocks because she’ll be safe in a rock draw (just don’t go around telling that to everyone, love!). Locky tries to convince Peter to join them and not go to a tie. Peter doesn’t want a bar of Locky!!
GETTIN’ ZIGGY WITH IT
At Tribal, Jericho tells Jono that Survivor’s not all about winning challenges (YES!). Michelle puts it out there that they are voting for Ziggy. Jono explains what happens in a tie and about rocks, blah blah blah. Michelle, Jericho and Peter desperately try and grab Tara’s vote, but what about Ziggy and Locky? Nah, those three are clever enough to know the meat heads don’t want to work with them. They’re all arguing about going to rocks, not going to rocks. Then my precious Ziggy opens her big mouth saying she’s happy if they do because she’ll be safe. This rings alarm bells in Tara’s head, and I low key wanted Tara to FLIP!
In the end Tara does the right thing for her game and flips on her sweet pea, Ziggy and sends her straight to the already stacked Jury! Ziggy becomes the most successful Olympian to play Survivor, tying with Crystal Cox from Survivor Gabon (6th place). Ziggy-4, Michelle-2.
EPISODE 23: Days 49-50
SOOKY LOCKY LALA
Tara calls Locky a sooky and I can’t stop laughing!! Locky confesses his love for Tara and she doesnt want to break up with him… But sometimes you just have to do what’s best for you in the game. They hug it out and move on.
Locky shows Tara an idol clue, damn you Anneliese for dropping it!! Tara is now convinced he has an idol, but Jericho isn’t; he’s been played before. Michelle is pissed off and can’t believe he has a (fake) idol! Hahaha.
RETURN OF THE CAR CURSE
It’s an Immunity and Reward Car Combo! Wow, I never thought we’d see the car reward come back, and more importantly, the controversial car curse! For those not in the know, they brought in a car reward from Season 2 (Aussie Outback) to Season 14 (Fiji), and every person who won the car went on to lose the game. Everyone thought they cancelled the car reward from then on because of the infamous curse, but really, sponsors ran out, haha. Anywhos, this challenge was extra special, because SHE WHO SUCKS AT CHALLENGES, Princess Michelle, goes from last to first place!
Despite Ziggy’s opinion, Michelle wins Immunity!! This moment reminded me of Courtney Yates winning Immunity in China; it shows the weakest and meekest of players can even win a challenge.
While Michelle, Jericho and Tara are on their picnic, Peter wants to see Locky’s idol… 😉 Everyone has their doubts about him having it, but they really have no clue. Later on, Michelle stalks Locky in the jungle and she learnt nothing from Luke’s creeper ways because he sees her. Michelle and Locky agree to vote for Peter. Locky does a brilliant job taking the heat off him with his fake idol story and sways Michelle’s vote!
SLOW AND STEADY WINS THE RACE
The Jury are AMAZED Michelle has won Immunity AND a car.
Michelle is willing to go against the best of the best (and that’s obviously, self proclaimed, Locky) and Peter’s face says it all. He looks worried. Peter is offended by Locky calling him a goat, and defends himself well. Tara starts talking about breeding goats, and that they are naturally independent, so someone like Peter should be called a Sheep. Best story of the season!!! And with that, the car curse is in effect. Michelle voting with Locky is probably the nail in her coffin. Locky-3, Peter-2.
SURVIVOR MEDAL TALLY
With all the top challenge threats out of the running, Michelle ends up being top spot!! Who would’ve thought right?! Jericho and Peter have come so close, and Tara makes her mark with a Bronze this week. It will be interesting to see what happens from here. I see Jericho and Peter stepping up, but don’t count Michelle out yet. Remember Jenna Morasca in the Amazon who was considered weak, but won 4 Immunity challenges that got her to Final 2. I do think her time is running out though, I personally hope it doesn’t! Peter, I absolutely adore, but his edit hasn’t really screamed WINNER, but as Australian Survivor has shown in the past, this means nothing. Tara is a real dark horse to win, but I’m not convinced this Jury will reward her. And lastly Jericho, I think he has the best shot to win this and has a great story to tell. I also think his biggest threat for the $500k is Michelle. BRING ON FINALE WEEK!!
As for overall medallists, Locky tops everyone with 3 Gold and he was SO close to 4, coz ya know…
THE SPICE RACK: WEEK TEN
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My stone-cold heart could not be moved this week as cutie-pie Jericho, and ice-queens Michelle and Tara moved to take out the last two remaining players, likely to think going for a bike ride counts as a date. The same could not be said for my partner, who I haven’t seen this visibly upset since I ate the last cupcake. He was still talking about Locky at breakfast this morning (lol jokes, more like this afternoon), and so I will do my best to do his crush pick justice this week and finally put it to rest forever (please). Similarly, poor Lyndz must also be an emotional wreck after losing her crush pick Ziggy. Straining to think of the best way to pay respect to the heartbreak felt by two people so dear to my own heart, I figured nothing could be more appropriate than going back to some of the original inspiration for the Spice Rack. This week’s ode to Locky and Ziggy will draw on a masterpiece written by Delores Fossen, Under the Sheriff’s Protection, which I found in the ‘free ebooks’ section of the Mills & Boon website. Enjoy!
‘No matter how hard she paced or how often she ordered her body to knock it off, it didn’t ease the restless energy. Only one thing would do that.’
The angry internet horde has been aiming its fury at Ziggy for a few weeks now. And sure, while Ziggy’s gameplay this season hasn’t exactly revealed a strategic mastermind, I can think of a whole list of inoffensive challenge beasts who don’t pop on television, and still have hundreds of fans. Do you need a man-bun for fans to forgive you? That said, I am glad we won’t have another finalist this year who sits at the end and has nothing to say other than ‘I was good at the challenges’. Not necessarily because this is any worse than claiming everyone else’s moves were your own, but because I myself am physically inept, and refuse to recognise that my shortcomings have any significance.
‘It was a full dose of his clever mouth that knew exactly how to set her on fire.’
Locky has delivered so much Twitter inspiration this season; he never failed to deliver. Only ten minutes into the first episode this week and he was already giving a heartfelt confessional about his concern that everyone else had realised he is just as amazing as he has always suspected. Clearly mistaking the rest of the tribe for Woo (Hwang; Survivor Cagayan), his final-5 pitch was telling everyone he was the best left in the game, and it would be an honour to lose to him.
This week it wasn’t Tara playing the role of the baby bird, cradled in his big strong arms. Instead, we had a classic crumby-step-dad-finally-stepping-up-to-the-plate saga, taking his new son Jericho out for a swim. ‘Oh, I thought you and Luke did this all the time, or I would have done it sooner’. Wow thanks for drawing more attention to his real dad’s deficiencies Locky, like it didn’t already hurt enough that Luke walked out last week.
Locky has really grown on me this season; I love his passive-aggressive responses to people mean-tweeting him, I love his total lack of irony, and I love that his ego is robust enough to tease him about it without worrying I’ve caused long term psychological damage. But he isn’t making the crush list until the Henry showmance stops being ‘lol no homo’ and gets real.
‘All in all, Richo figured his kissing ploy to test Gina’s memory was a success.’
Sure, the biggest, loudest, bestest, most strategic players haven’t made it to the end. But I think I would be happy with anyone winning at this stage. Jericho is undeniably adorable, wholesome, and would be the kind of male winner I could get behind. Michelle is abrasive, but an unbelievably persuasive speaker, and has made some important strategic decisions – I really hope she breaks the car curse. Tara is the love of my life, and I could probably sustain myself for weeks off the schadenfreude induced by casual-tears. And Peter deserves half a mil for being so good looking. Next week looks like it will be long, but ultimately rewarding.
Blog by Lynda Olson. Guest writer; Annabel Fidler.
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